You know what? Life is so hard!
I told my husband that I was going to delete my facebook because it seemed like everyone was having an awesome time with a perfect life and I was dealing with death, struggle and not looking so good in pictures.
It's interesting because I know I will put up a good picture but one that I have the old lady neck and look like a cow...I forget that picture even though it might have been the best night of my life. I am so superficial...
Anyway, it has been a week with intensity and sadness and exaustion and goodness and kindness and witnessed strength in the most difficult of situations. I got to see people much stronger than I am...live life to the fullest.
I guess I need to take some of my own medicine. As I used to say when I was a camp nurse... "buck up" and "rub some dirt in it...you'll be fine."
But I have to say...Life is hard...for everyone at one time or another. I love the t-shirts that talk about life being good...and it is but...it is also hard!
So love the good times with abandon because everyone will have hard times and when that happens...the person you think you are will have the test of a lifetime.
As a husband of one of my dying patients told me this week..." I don't want to have regrets. I want to care for her and so I don't have to worry that I didn't do a good job...didn't do everything I could do to keep her comfortable and make her know that she is loved." I told him, " You are doing all that , my friend...you are doing an amazing job."
May you have someone on this earth that loves you that much...in this hard life...
We'll tawk tomorrow,
I love you all,